A Simple Thing Called Love

what a tiring day it has been.
juz reached home frm gym session.
i think my trainer is fun man.
she made exercising enjoyable.
and i feel much better now.
at least it has helped me keep my temper under control.
i've been really mad at the school's total lack of understanding.
my goodness.
after prelims, did they at least give us one damn day of rest?
held us up and forced us to listen to talks.
sheesh, im so disappointed in them larh.
and guess what?
i screwed my maths and geog.
maths was expected larh but geog..
well i hope that at least there is an improvement.
i feel like telling the math teachers right to their face to stop FORCING me to achieve the things that i DONT BLOODY WANT TO.
and the school has also taken away our saturdays for amaths lessons.
now i've gotta travel 2 hours for juz a maths lesson. tsk.
haiz i can juz go on complaining forever man.
i wish they could juz give us a break.
and if they refuse to do so, i'll take my own break.
gosh i realise that as i grow up, im getting increasingly rebellious.
its juz that i dont see a purpose in life, conforming to societal norms and not living the way you want to.
and not to mention that i cant find my place in this world.

18 September 2007

6:58 PM

so finally the damn prelims are over.
went to macs aft sch with abt 6 of the gurls.
then went to sukee's hse and watched cody banks 2.
movie was good but i was super tired.
juz got the harry potter book from sukee.
and im sure that for the next few days, i'll be buried in the book.
last night went to see my new nephew.
im chitti now, can you believe it?
well anw, he cant call me chitti, only akka.
his name is probably gonna be ashwinder singh.
the first punjabi born into the family, haha.
he's really cute you knw?
very, very fair and chubby.
and you knw what?
that damn boy of mine said on the BLOODY TELEVISION that he likes monisha.
one of the participants of the show he's judging.
i was pissed larh please. grr.
dont think the gurls are going to sch tmrw..
and neither am i.
all boring jc talks which i wouldnt even need.
post-prelim activities are sucha bore, tsk.
and i realise that i get really, really quiet at times nowadays.
the memories are painfully poignant i spose.
and when you walk away,
i count the steps that you take.

10 September 2007

4:27 PM

amaths paper tdae was utterly horrid.
it was the most horrible paper ever.
so im definitely failing.
it doesnt matter much to me coz im not gonna take amaths into my L1R5.
but what im upset abt is disappointing ms ang.
shes sucha dedicated tcher and i respect her for that.
but once again, i disappointed her.
haiz, its sad really.
moving on, everyone knws that i dont go for character in guys.
all the guys i've dated.. well, i found them good-looking in one way or another.
thats why my relationship with guys never lasts.
but as im growing up and maturing, i sense a change within me.
i've learnt to appreciate guys with excellent character, smth i didnt do before.
one of the guys is of course my boy, sim.
no, we're not in a relationship or anyth.
we're juz friends but im used to calling him my boy.
anw, he has the reputation of a rake and a flirt in society.
out of 10 pple, 9 will say speak of him badly.
but recently, i got to knw him better.
juz watch him in vijay tv's super jodi show.
he's one of the judges.
if you actually observe him with an open-mind, you'll realise that he's a truly admirable person.
he never hurts anyone with harsh comments and look at the way he speaks to the participants.
for instance, bubbloo was saying that he wanted to make his father proud by becoming a big star coz his father was in his last stages of lung cancer.
and my boy replied, "you are already a big star. why do you think you're not a star? im sure your dad is proud of you."
which star will actually say such things to someone obviously much inferior to him?
this is juz one of the many things which has proven that he has a heart of gold.
and im proud to say that he's my friend.
for all those out there, dont judge him based on rumours.
take the time and effort to get to knw him and you'll realise that he's a remarkable person.
and please, dont speak of him or judge him if you dont know him. thanks.
on the train tdae, my friends kept teasing me abt Hydrogen.
they said that i'll hold on to her forever coz i love her too much to let go.
well i juz kept quiet all the way coz i dont hafta prove to anyone that i've let go.
i held on to her for so freaking long despite the pain coz yes, i love her a lot.
but now, i love her more than before and thats why i've let go.
you hafta love someone enough to actually be able to let he/she go if clearly, he/she is better off without you.
and did i mention that i've got hyperactive tear glands?

08 September 2007

11:11 PM

ms ang msged me ystrdae.
i screwed up amaths paper one.
so i decided to do maths tdae.
the fear finally made me sit down and work on it.
but it was kinda useless coz its too last minute.
alicia asked me for her number juz now.
and in a desperate attempt to prove to myself that i forgot her, i immediately sent her the number.
then i realised that i shd've asked her permission first.
so i told her larh.
but i dont undst why i kept checking my phone the entire day aft that.
i kinda successfully managed to convinve myself that i wasnt looking forward to her msg.
until she accidentally msged me at night.
words wont be able to describe what went on within me that moment.
you knw when i think abt this, i can literally feel my spirit being crushed.
so i'll stop and get to reading. (:

05 September 2007

8:19 PM

its weds already..
and believe it or not, i havent touched books since last weds.
thats a whole bloody week without mugging.
what i've been doing?
hmm, watching movies, movies and more movies.
oh, and reema sen too.
went to NUH tdae..
uncle met with an accident last night.
he doesnt even speed larh please.
daddy speeds like hell.
actually i like it a lot coz i find it damn cool.
but now, i think its better not to larh.
i cant wait to go to the zoo on fridae!!
-starts singing.
im going to the zoo, zoo, zoo.
how abt you, you, you?
you can come too, too, too.
im going to the zoo, zoo, zoo!
when i actually allow myself to think abt you,
it hurts so deeply to know that i cant get you.
~~and i miss you.~~

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